Clever phrases for conversation. Smart words for communication - the art of conversation

Clever phrases for conversation. Smart words for communication - the art of conversation

Oratory valued in any society. It is easier for a person who knows how to correctly and competently compose a dialogue to find a job, get promoted up the career ladder, and make new acquaintances. People around him listen to him more often; his monologue never seems inappropriate or stupid.

But the paradox is that in order for others to perceive you as smart and educated person, it is enough to expand your vocabulary by only about fifty words.

It is enough to use some smart words for communication in order to appear in the eyes of others as an extraordinary, creative person.

The art of competent communication

It will not be difficult to master this vocabulary if you wish. Much more important will be a confident voice, clear diction and the appropriateness of using certain words. Surely you have encountered a situation in life when a person, conducting a dialogue, tries with all his might to use abstruse words to communicate, sometimes using them completely out of place and in the wrong inflection. Such attempts look ridiculous and funny. To prevent this from happening to you, armed with a vocabulary for all occasions, do not be lazy to find out the exact meaning of words, their synonyms and antonyms, declension, gender and stress. This is the only way you will be able to use them correctly and competently in conversation.

Getting rid of banality

The first thing you should do is try to use hackneyed expressions and words that you use in your everyday life to a minimum. For example, a banal set of words like “good”, “beautiful”, “smart”, etc. can be replaced with less hackneyed, alternative options, because each of them can be accessed using explanatory dictionary choose at least a dozen synonyms.

For example, the word “beautiful,” depending on the situation, can be replaced with bright, elegant, luxurious, incomparable, magnificent, delightful. “Useful” can be used in everyday conversation as beneficial, fruitful, expedient, practical, necessary. Even to a simple word“smart”, there are many synonyms. You should remember and appeal to them as necessary. Here are some of them: witty, resourceful, quick-witted, sensible, wise, intelligent.

It also doesn’t hurt to learn some smart words and their meaning, thanks to which you can produce the necessary effect on others:

Idiosyncrasy &ndash, intolerance.

Transcendental, abstract, mental, theoretical.

Esoterics &ndash, mystical teaching.

A truism is a well-known fact, statement or opinion.

Euphemism – replacement of harsh, rude words and expressions with more acceptable and soft ones.

Sophistry – the ability to argue sharply, skillfully juggle words.

Eclecticism is a combination of different types of theories, views or things.

Homogeneous – homogeneous.

Invective &ndash, swearing, obscene language.

Decadence &ndash, decline.

Hyperbole &ndash, exaggeration.

Frustration &ndash, disappointment.

Discourse &ndash, conversation, conversation.

At first, when using smart words to communicate, you may experience some awkwardness in the conversation; your language will seem to tangle and stumble over “new expressions.” It's okay; a new colloquial form, like a new pair of shoes, should be worn in. After a while, you will, without thinking, choose better synonyms and expressions to express your opinion.

Speech-clogging expressions

The most difficult part of this process may be learning to notice them in your own speech. If you cannot notice them on your own, you may need the help of loved ones with whom you often communicate, or a voice recorder. At the next stage, you should learn to either skip them or replace them with smart words for communication; to consolidate the result, you also need to periodically listen to your own monologue recorded on a voice recorder. In the process of mastering the organization and production of your own speech, try to speak thoughtfully, logically constructing each phrase; this is the only way, after some time, you will be able to master the art of competently conducting a dialogue.

By learning to clearly structure sentences, using smart words to communicate, and getting rid of expressions that clog your speech, you will be able to make an excellent impression, because the more competently a person speaks, the more intelligent and successful he seems to his interlocutors.

How are cool expressions and phrases useful? For any occasion in life, some people always have jokes, jokes, sayings that can help others. A witty, ironic, cheerful person endures adversity more easily and will not be at a loss for words.

Reality sometimes presents not the most pleasant surprises. Overload at the workplace, stressful situations in your own home, uncertainty about friends, work colleagues, and the future in general often leads to a breakdown. It goes without saying that at such moments my soul is just scratching like cats. What to do in such turbulent times?

What will help relieve stress?

Many people, finding themselves victims of unexpected pressure, try to seek, if not oblivion, then recharge, in the regular use of various stimulants. Moreover, some of them begin to support themselves with relatively safe energy drinks, and end their lives as avid drug addicts.

Even our favorite tea is one of these energy drinks. It is known that tea can lift your spirits for no apparent reason. However, over time, this can lead to true chemical dependence. Therefore, it is much better to relieve stress by remembering and using cool expressions for any occasion.

Will humor and jokes help cope with stress?

Jokes and gags that are appropriate to the situation can improve your mood and relieve stress without any additional chemical doping. It is for this reason that the article is devoted to humorous expressions applicable in a wide variety of life situations .

By reading it, you will not only improve your mood here and now. By remembering some of these expressions, you can cheer yourself up whenever the need arises. Moreover, such a beneficial effect will have virtually no side effects.

The main thing here is not to overdo it when communicating with people who do not understand humor. After all, some can condemn even the most innocent joke, and light sarcasm for them is like a personal insult!

When can funny expressions about life be used in speech?

If you can't change the situation, change your attitude towards it. This is the cultivation of positive character traits that help you move through life easier, quickly find new friends and help old ones. Cool expressions, filled with subtle humor, will help defuse the situation in almost any situation. They can be used both when something went wrong and when the heart is filled with joy. The most important thing is that the interlocutor is on the same emotional wavelength with you. If this condition is met, neither you nor your listeners will be bored.

Examples of the coolest expressions about family life

In this block you will find the most famous funny expressions that can be used when communicating with family members. It is especially recommended that the male half study this block: do not forget that women love witty people. Introducing our TOP 10:

  1. Marital ties are a difficult matter, so they are usually carried out by two people, and sometimes by three people.
  2. Lover from his first marriage.
  3. A woman’s naivety: even watching porn films, she hopes that sex will end in marriage.
  4. A declaration of love is like a signal of the exact time. It is true only at the moment of utterance.
  5. My trembling half.
  6. You and I are of the same blood - you are Chuk, I am Gek.
  7. When it’s raining and sad outside, nag your husband - create an atmosphere of comfort.
  8. It's better to be jealous of a woman's stove than her computer.
  9. My children are concerned about where everything came from, and I am concerned about where everything went.
  10. Happiness is when the desired moments coincide with the inevitable ones.
  11. A strong marriage is a humble husband and wife who treats him like a king.

Cool expressions on vacation

To fill your holiday with smiles and fun, you can use almost any jokes and gags. The most suitable ones would be funny expressions from films. If none come to mind, remember something from the following TOP:

  1. One drop of nicotine will kill a horse, three hundred can kill
  2. A quickly drunk glass cannot be considered full.
  3. Today you don’t drink with us, but tomorrow you will betray your Motherland.
  4. Eat, be full, dear guests. If you have completely lost your conscience, then you can come tomorrow.
  5. WITH smart people It's nice to talk, but hard to work.
  6. My life is passing away so quickly, as if she is no longer interested in me.
  7. There are no ugly women - there are underfunded ones.
  8. To make a woman happy, sometimes allow her to do nothing.
  9. A person who values ​​life will not distort it with dirty thoughts.
  10. Monogamous will make only one person unhappy.

Cool phrases and expressions that are appropriate in line to see a doctor


Are you going to see the doctor again? Don't despair! Our coolest expressions, presented in the following TOP, can make a visit to the doctor easy and fun:

  1. Visit the website of the dental clinic - www.zubov.net.
  2. One head is already good, but the body will also come in handy.
  3. The patient refused an autopsy, so the doctor was forced to treat him.
  4. The doctor cannot prolong life, so he prolongs the disease.
  5. The doctor asks the patient with a knife in his back: “Are you in a lot of pain?” - No, it only gets unpleasant when I laugh.
  6. Medicines are so expensive that as long as you earn money on them, time will heal.
  7. New version of the Hippocratic oath: only upon presentation of an insurance policy...
  8. This is what our Predictionmus suffered.
  9. The more free the healthcare is, the more expensive the medicines.
  10. It was a beautiful leg... Give me the second one!

Cool expressions to use during a quarrel

Of course, quarrels are not the most pleasant thing. But even they can be made less painful if you learn to “send away” people you don’t like more or less beautifully. Below is the next TOP, in which you will find expressions with meaning, cool insults to cultural people:

  1. How much will the principles be on your exchange today?
  2. Of course, everyone wants to be honest... But they want to be rich more.
  3. Yes, it’s high time to weed your head.
  4. Grunting is the new sign of agreement!
  5. There are simply no unbearable people, there are only narrow doors.
  6. Who made such a face at you?
  7. Let it be rubbish. But take as much as you want!
  8. I noticed by your alarm clock’s face that you’re getting ready to ring again.
  9. There is no need to stage thoughts here.
  10. And I don’t want to live, and I’m too lazy to shoot myself.

Cool expressions about gray everyday life

Cool expressions about life are an opportunity to brighten up gray everyday life. Want to see this for yourself? Read the following TOP:

  1. Soon they will start imprisoning all the malicious bribe defaulters.
  2. Don't smile at me like a tax inspector.
  3. I'm having more and more prophetic nightmares.
  4. To be completely happy, I want to survive.
  5. The 112 service received another call. The rescuers were upset, but decided not to pick up the phone.
  6. If a bald spot is a path trampled by thoughts, then I am the most thinking person!
  7. Even New Year someone hates. Well, for example, Christmas trees.
  8. To eat so much, you will have to eat.
  9. If you are always surrounded by fools, then you are the most important of them.
  10. I’d rather be covered in sweat seven times than frost once.

Cool expressions used instead of insults

There are people to whom you can explain it 1000 times, repeat it - it’s all useless! However, even in this case, you should not despair and be sad. After all, cool expressions for communicating with an unpleasant interlocutor can be suitable in slippery situations. Communication with “especially gifted” people is no exception. To find out how to point out to such people the stupidity of their situation, remember a few expressions from the following TOP:

  1. Sewerage is the only thing that can unite you and me.
  2. I see you are smart! I see that the skull is too tight. I can fix it.
  3. Smile wider, the boss needs more idiots.
  4. Don't make me nervous! I already have nowhere to hide corpses!
  5. There is only one hero. When there are many heroes, they are called hooligans.
  6. I see that soon someone will get away with a slight fright.
  7. You won't have to wait long for a warning shot to the head.
  8. Be careful, take care of yourself, don't let your brain think.
  9. If I get up I'm afraid nuclear war will ruin such a wonderful day for you.
  10. More and more often I feel an irresistible desire to obscenely admire your behavior.

Cool expressions to help you admit your mistake

Oddly enough, cool funny expressions can smooth out the situation when you don’t want to laugh at all. One of these situations is the need to admit your own mistakes. To find out what you can say in such an inconvenient case, check out the next TOP:

  1. The source of my wisdom is my experience. The source of my experience is my stupidity.
  2. There are people who don’t make mistakes, which means they are simply afraid to act.
  3. Our delusions will die before us, so there is no need to make a mummy out of them.
  4. Experience is a thing that you get instead of what you wanted.
  5. Experience is a thing that appears immediately after it was needed.
  6. I won’t try to explain anything in between slaps. And it will turn out unclear, and you will have to repeat it.
  7. Why commit the sin of despondency because of mistakes when there are plenty of more pleasant sins around!
  8. Today I am quieter than water and funnier than grass.
  9. And yet, I didn’t manage to break all the decency today.
  10. Wisdom is not about not making mistakes, but about not repeating them.

Descriptions of news and other recent events

Watching the news these days can be just as stressful as talking to an angry boss. Our final TOP “Cool catchphrases about modern life” will provide you with invaluable help in decompressing:

  1. On election day, people cast ballots.
  2. Also say that Lenin was a skinhead!
  3. The main thing is to win. After all, the winners will not be imprisoned.
  4. Walking at night is the easiest way to commit suicide.
  5. Debauchery is any sex in which you are not involved.
  6. The longer I think, the more convinced I am that Eve not only ate the forbidden apple, but also made a fashionable bag out of the poor Snake.
  7. If I'm on a plane, I'll choose a seat in the front. If the plane crashes, the beer cart will pass by me again! At least I'll get drunk before I die.
  8. It seems that rare steaks of the second group will soon become the most common dish.
  9. Driver, beware of places where children can suddenly jump out!
  10. Psychoanalysis is the brain's efforts to obtain pleasure intended for another organ.

A little more about the benefits of cool phrases and expressions in everyday life

If the article on the topic “Cool expressions for any occasion” motivates at least someone not to resort to various chemical doping just to cope with the negative effects of stress, then it was not written in vain.

Of course, constant stress is an unpleasant thing, but you can and should learn to cope with it without medication. Is it difficult? Not really. It will be difficult only at the very beginning. These difficulties can especially affect those who have already become dependent on some chemical substances.

If we're talking about about drug addiction or advanced alcoholism, in order to overcome the addiction, you will most likely have to consult a narcologist.

However, most readers do not fall into this demographic. This means you can train your own mind to successfully cope with stress. To achieve this goal without serious difficulties, you need to learn how to switch from what upsets you to the exact opposite moments. It won't be long before you notice that achieving this goal is not difficult at all. The main thing here is not to let yourself get wound up!

After all, if someone from your environment behaves rudely, it is his problem, not yours. Why waste your energy on other people's problems? And even if you were wrong: what will the hassle and bitter tears give? Isn't it better to just draw the right conclusions and not repeat past missteps and mistakes?

The media will rain down a barrage of negative news on us in an endless stream. And what does this give? Will there be fewer wars? Will planes stop crashing? Will all drivers and pedestrians learn to obey traffic rules? Unfortunately, all these questions can be considered rhetorical. Therefore, you still shouldn’t worry too much about everything that the media brings down on us. Let's live in harmony with our nervous system. And constant stress has never prolonged anyone’s health!

Therefore, the only thing that can really help us is the correct attitude towards everything that happens both in the world around us and directly in our lives. It is easier to endure any difficulties in a calm state of mind. And the best helpers in constant apathy, depression and constant fear are ourselves. The ability to own your own consciousness, to have in reserve cool phrases and expressions are one type of positive survival.

Continue to look at your life with a smile, endure difficulties with a cool head and notice the positive aspects in any situation. And most importantly - stop worrying about trifles! Life loves those who take it easy! And then everything in your life will be just wonderful!

It is impossible to imagine our life without laughter and smiles, without humor and fun. Therefore, from time to time, each of us needs to step away from everyday worries, relax and have at least a little fun. Cool phrases and funny sayings- a sure wonderful remedy for quick recovery Have a good mood. Cool phrases and statuses are very popular because they describe exciting moments in the lives of many people in a humorous way. They will help you amaze your interlocutors with your wit, as well as amuse your friends, colleagues, bored company or guests at a holiday party. Cool expressions can also be useful to “defuse” tense situations or in awkward situations when you need to correct your mistake.
There are many wonderful funny phrases and expressions. I tried to select the best, coolest “phrases” that, in my opinion, deserve the most attention. Read, and let no one be left without a smile!

  • My character, of course, is not sugar, but I was not created to be added to tea!
  • If I ever die because of a man, it will be from laughing.
  • I'm neither good nor bad. I am kind with an evil stripe!
  • I only have one life and I can't afford to be unhappy!
  • I thought I was special, but it turned out I was better than everyone else...
  • It’s not enough to know your worth—you also need to be in demand.
  • What it is, you can’t put it back!!!
  • So what if the wind is in my head, but my thoughts are always fresh...
  • Where have you seen a cat that cares what mice say about it?
  • If you spit in my back, it means I'm ahead of you!
  • Don't tell me what to do and I won't tell you where to go!
  • If you want me to be an angel, organize heaven for me!
  • My life my rules. If you don't like my rules, don't interfere in my life.
  • Not noticed in vicious relationships... Wasn’t it? No... Not noticed!
  • You need to live in such a way that others experience depression!
  • When will they learn to put light into women's handbags?! I really need it!!!
  • We are strong women: we will take out the trash and brains if necessary!
  • I'm losing weight on three diets! (I can’t get enough of two...)
  • He eats - I cook, he wears - I wash, he scatters - I clean. And what would I do without him...
  • Women's folk fun: she came up with it herself, she herself was offended.
  • I’m like champagne: I can be playful, but I can also hit you in the head...
  • I really want to be a weak woman, but, as luck would have it, the horses are galloping, the huts are on fire...
  • Sometimes my husband shudders from me... Still, I am an amazing woman!!!
  • The girls are standing on the sidelines, fiddling with handkerchiefs in their hands... Because for every ten girls, according to statistics: 1 is gay, 4 are alcoholics, 2 are divorced, 2 are drug addicts and 1 is normal, but he is married...
  • What is the difference between fake love and real love? Fake: “I like the snowflakes on your hair!” The real one: “Fool, why without a hat?”
  • If a woman has sparkles in her eyes, it means the cockroaches in her head are celebrating something.
  • - How to drive a girl crazy?
    - Give her a lot of money and close all the stores!
  • Men, let's do the laundry, clean, cook, iron... and we want you!
  • I really want to snuggle up to someone, put my lips to my ear and whisper...: “Give me money!”
  • Sometimes I open my closet, look at it for a long time and realize that I’m keeping two-thirds of my clothes in case I go crazy.
  • Classic women's wardrobe: Nothing to wear. There is nowhere to hang it. It would be a pity to throw it away... And there is also a section “Suddenly I’ll lose weight”...
  • You need to smile so widely that problems stumble over your smile!
  • An optimist is a person who, even having fallen face first into the mud, is sure that it is healing!
  • Girls, who wanted to lose weight by spring?.. It’s too late to rush around, let’s take it with charm!
  • This morning, while I was putting on makeup, I fainted 5 times from my beauty...
  • Previously, I lived alone and all my things were lying haphazardly in their places, but now I’m married and all my things are neatly and beautifully lying in an unknown place...
  • I want fate to take me by the hair and head straight into happiness, happiness, happiness.
  • A woman should be loved, happy, beautiful! And she doesn’t owe anyone anything anymore!!!
  • The smartest plant is the horseradish: it knows everything...
  • Now I live only by this principle: whoever wants it will come, whoever needs it will call, whoever is bored will find it! And who cares, those don’t care!
  • All men are bastards! They all only need one thing! But why, why not from me-me-me?!
  • I would send you, but I can see you from there!
  • Women are not interested in wimps only if those wimps are men.
  • If you think that life is wonderful, then the antidepressants are chosen correctly.
  • If there are nails on the feet, then there should be hands on the hands, and animals generally have bast shoes!
  • There is nothing better in the world than creaking your bed until dawn!
  • Judging by the way life fucks me, I'm sexy as fuck!
  • The robbers demand your purse or your life, the women demand both.
  • Never do evil out of spite! Nasty things must come from the heart!
  • The smarter a woman is, the more sophisticated and varied she blows her man away!
  • Any dirty trick can be put to proper use if there is a desire...
  • Queens are never upset. When they are sad, they simply execute someone...
  • The weaker sex is stronger than the stronger sex due to the weakness of the stronger sex towards the weaker.
  • Long live split personality - the shortest path to mental balance!
  • Our spring is late, our summer is delayed... And autumn, the bastard, is punctual!
  • I’m a woman—evil comes as standard!
  • Don't you want to be nice? - Let's remove the Vaseline!
  • I am a creative woman. I want - I create, I want - I create...
  • With a teaspoon in my pocket, with a bald cactus in my hand, I’m going to scare the old woman who lives in the attic, I’ll poke him with a spoon, I’ll order him to sit on the cactus... I’m a bit of a fool - I have a certificate!..
  • Vasilisa was a magician... If she waves her right sleeve - a lake... If she waves her left sleeve - swans... She waves another 200 grams - and the hallucinations are more complicated...
  • Happiness is when you have a doctor, a cop, a lawyer and a killer among your friends. Immediately life becomes somehow easier...
  • There are people who are like a drug—you know you can’t, but you’re drawn to it. And there are people like cake - sweet, tasty, but sick...
  • I want to be like a bear: to eat in the summer and hibernate in the winter. And I lost weight, and slept well, and didn’t see frost!
  • Grandfather Frost, I behaved well for a whole year... and now can I kill someone???
  • I caught a goldfish. She listened to me very carefully and said: “Fry!”
  • And they carry me away, and carry me away, into the colored ringing crap, three white horses, two red elephants, a penguin, a hippopotamus and a deer.
  • What doesn’t kill us, we regret it very much later.
  • I am the air. Don't try to hold it back. Breathe while I let myself breathe...
  • My beloved told me: “You are evil in the flesh!” Well, I'll implement it. I'm very obedient. And if for some reason he needs it, then how can I ignore the request!
  • I’m a very good cook... I can cook noodles... Brew porridge... Add oil... In general, I’m a clever wizard.
  • "Baby, I love you!" - excellent status! And all the suns are pleasant, and you won’t get burned...
  • - You need to treat a girl carefully, like a Christmas tree.
    — Knock it out and take it home?
  • — Strangers make comments to my child! How to react?
    — Teach your child the magic spell: “My mother teaches me that not every value judgment should serve as a behavior modifier.” When pronounced with clear diction and confident, benevolent intonation, it acts similarly to the spell: “Petrify!” And more reliably. Although not for long. But without dangerous side effects.
  • You begin to understand that everything is really bad when the person who usually calms everyone down cries...
  • As my grandmother used to say, it’s better to shoot, reload and shoot again than to shine a flashlight and ask “who’s there?”
  • In any situation, say “everything is going according to plan” - you never know what kind of fucking plan you have.
  • Sometimes it becomes so cool that something that was once so important has become so irrelevant...
  • And I will leave without noticing any offense.
    Chewing a chocolate candy.
    And may the evil horse love you,
    And not a sunshine like me.
  • “Darling, is it true that I’m your only one?”
    - Have you all come to an agreement today, or what!?
  • A woman, like fire, should not be left unattended. Either it will go out, or it will burn everything to hell!!!
  • Alcohol does not help you find the answer, it helps you forget the question...
  • Darling, you insist so much on our relationship with you... I don’t understand, you have nervous system made of reinforced concrete or lifelong reservation in a madhouse?
  • Sometimes you think: this is happiness! But no, damn it, experience again...
  • You drown a person, and it seems so sad, but then bubbles appear, so good, and your heart rejoices.
  • It’s easy to understand women’s logic; just learn how to play billiards with cubes.
  • You only need to sort things out with those with whom you have these relationships. The rest - why don't they go to the shore of silence, collect shells...
  • Happiness is when the previous shit has already ended, and the next one has not yet begun.
  • Cockroaches in the head are still normal. The problem is when the squirrel starts chasing them out...
  • A black cat crossing your path means that the animal is going somewhere. Don't complicate things!..
  • You need to return to the woman as quickly as possible. So quickly that she doesn’t have time to understand that she’s fine without you.
  • If you love it, set it free. If he doesn't come back, track him down and kill him.
  • There are a lot of other people's nerves in the world - there's no point in worrying about your own!
  • I bought cockroach chalk! Now it’s quiet and calm in my head... they sit, draw...
  • You'll send someone rashly. And in your soul you worry: did you get there?... didn’t you get there?...
  • - Who are you?
    - Kind fairy!
    - Why with an axe?
    - Yes, the mood is not very good...
  • She got up on the wrong foot, sat on the wrong broom and generally flew in the wrong direction...
  • Give me wings, otherwise the broom will leave splinters all over my ass!
  • In general, I love raspberry pies. Of course, they don’t reciprocate, but they don’t behave like bastards either!
  • — What will you order?
    - Please, I need nerves, intelligence, calmness and s*zz... Yes, more szma, please.
  • Don't be a cheapskate - give the person a second chance. Don't be an idiot - never give a third.
  • Nerves are in shock, brains are in a trance, and logic has completely gone and shot itself.
  • If my mother taught me to be cultured, this does not mean that I will not kick you in the eye, as my father taught me!
  • A realist is someone who doesn't care whether the glass is half full or half empty. For him, what's in the glass is more important.
  • No matter what the rake teaches, the heart believes in miracles...
  • It's amazing how much some people enjoy romantic walks along the rake.
  • If you constantly step on the same rake, then it’s a fucking rake!
  • Smile more often - and the thicket will smile at you!
  • Yes, I'm not an angel, but flying on a broom is faster.
  • Everyone thinks that every girl's dream is to find the perfect guy. No matter how it is! Our dream is to eat and not gain weight!
  • All women are angels, but if you cut their wings, they start flying on a broom.
  • A man should be able to do two things: set fire to huts and scare horses, so that his woman has something to do and not blow his brains out.
  • ...and yet it is IMPORTANT that the butterflies in the stomach come to an agreement with the cockroaches in the head!
  • Yesterday, it seemed, I had gained my wits... Today I woke up - but no, I just gained my wits...
  • I don’t promise to lead you to sin, but I will…
  • There’s no need to offend me, I’m a vulnerable girl, the first thing brings me to tears... And then, with tear-stained eyes, it’s so difficult to understand who you hit with the shovel...
  • This morning they showed such horrors in the mirror...
  • I don't drink flowers or sweets!
  • - Girl, why haven’t we met yet?
    - God will take care of you, stupid creature...
  • I have no excess weight. I have it as a spare.
  • Female philologist: bright multiple sarcasms on the first date.
  • While men, being boys, play war games and cars, women, being girls, immediately prepare to manipulate people and play with dolls.
  • It’s better to be a beloved mischief than to be a perfection that no one needs.
  • Listen to the voice of reason... Do you hear? Do you hear what crap he is talking about?!
  • For a woman to go to bed with a man, she needs a feeling of closeness, trust and a strong connection. A man's place is mainly...
  • Squirrels eat snow. What are you doing to make winter end?
  • People who helped spring and ate snow, why did you also eat asphalt?
  • A glassblower accidentally sneezed at work and created a new vase for the Ikea store.
  • If things don't go the way you want, it's not your business, let them pass by.
  • Don't know how to relieve stress? Don't wear it!!!
  • It is incorrect to say “the toad is strangling.” It should be like this: “amphibiotropic asphyxia happened to me”
  • Koala macaque dipped in cocoa. The koala lazily lapped cocoa...
  • Squirrels in gaiters poke around cedar kernels in the depths of the tundra. In the depths of the tundra, otters in gaiters are digging for cedar kernels in buckets! Having torn out the gaiters from an otter in the tundra, wipe the cedar kernels with the otter, wipe the otter's face with the gaiters - the kernels into buckets, the otter into the tundra.
  • Having washed the leg warmers in the swamp, put the kernels in buckets, the otters and the squirrels in an embrace quietly finished the jar... While finishing the moonshine, the otters danced a jig, the squirrels tried on the leg warmers, muttering that they had seen a worse holiday in the tundra.
  • I speak English with only a dictionary, but I’m still shy with people...
  • When sliding under the table, do not forget to politely say goodbye to your guests.
  • There is a genius sleeping within each of us. And every day it gets stronger and stronger...
  • I don’t know what you’re taking for your head, but it’s clearly not helping you!
  • Sorry, I'm saying when you interrupt…
  • Beautiful woman pleases male gaze, ugly - female!
  • There are no perpetual motion machines in the world, but there are plenty of perpetual brakes!
  • Take care of your homeland! Vacation abroad!
  • I'm constantly being followed smart thoughts, but I find myself faster...
  • Everyone is spoiled to the best of their ability.
  • If a gentleman says to a lady, “I understand you perfectly,” he means, “You talk twice as much as you need to”!
  • If you leave your husband correctly, he will definitely return... like a boomerang.
  • If you want to bring a person to sclerosis, give him a loan.
  • Looking at how some accumulate good, others begin to accumulate evil.
  • There are so many interesting things in this life and so few people are interested.
  • If you want to marry a smart, beautiful and rich woman, marry three times.
  • Sclerosis cannot be cured, but you can forget about it.
  • If you cannot be a star in the sky, at least become a lamp in the house.
  • A man, even if he could understand what a woman was thinking, would still not believe it.
  • The best way to organize a panic is to ask everyone to remain calm.
  • Everyone wants to have a good time, but you won't have one.
  • Tell me I'm wrong and I'll tell you who you are.
  • What a pity that you are finally leaving!..
  • Lost conscience. I ask the finder not to worry and keep it for himself.

Talk. Cool phrases will help in this matter. They can be different, funny, philosophical or ordinary everyday ones.

The main thing is to know in which cases which cool phrases to use. This is exactly what will be discussed next. No, in this article we will not provide specific examples expressions and phrases, you can easily find them on the Internet or in books. We will talk about the situational relevance of a particular type of phrases and their construction, because quoting is not always appropriate, sometimes there is a need to show off your own intelligence.

So, funny phrases. TO this kind expressions include various phrases aimed at raising the mood of the interlocutor, his emancipation and increasing his communicative capabilities at the time of dialogue. When using funny phrases in a conversation, the main thing is to observe the limits of decency and in no case resort to vulgarity and black humor; if you are just starting a conversation, this can lead to trouble and give the interlocutor the wrong idea about you. Subtle humor, unobtrusiveness and impersonality are the key to successful dialogue using funny phrases.

Philosophical phrases have great impact when dialogue with a girl or with a person standing above you on the intellectual ladder, for example with a teacher. Using in conversation philosophical phrases, the main thing is not to overdo it with wisdom and abstruse words, perhaps some girls like it, but not all of them and the latter more. If the dialogue takes place with an adult who is a priori intellectually more developed than you, as the online magazine of quotes and aphorisms Epigraf.su recommends, it is better to slow down, otherwise you will look stupid when the interlocutor begins to delve into the knowledge of the world of philosophy, be more restrained and choose or re-read all philosophical literature so as not to fall face down.

Well, as for everyday phrases that can be included in the category of funny ones, there is no point in talking about this a lot; it will be enough to say that you will not find such phrases in textbooks, they must be born in your head. And for this to happen, you just need, from time to time, to force your brain to work in the right direction.

Beautiful phrases as a means of communication

I always like and am impressed when people speak correctly and interesting phrases, not dry, faceless sentences, but phrases. Because I am sure that a sentence and phrases are completely different concepts.

The phrase has a completely different level. If a person speaks in phrases, then it immediately becomes clear that he is smart, intelligent and educated. And this developed, I think, a very long time ago, in the era of formation cultural Russia, starting around the 18th century. It was then that people began to study the languages ​​and cultures of other peoples and strive to speak correctly and even “floridly.”

Today, of course, this concept has somewhat lost its relevance and significance, and young people, unfortunately, are less and less likely to use real, for example, funny phrases in their conversations, and speak in some language incomprehensible to an educated person. modern man language. But that's their right. I think the time will come and everything will fall into place.

The ability to speak correctly is the lot of the older generation. It has already calmed down, gained wisdom, and speaking youth to an adult is even funny and indecent. Although there are exceptions, you can’t live without them either. Agree, it’s nice to communicate with a person who, even in a joking conversation, does not speak in interjections, but, imagine, funny phrases. Which more clearly and clearly explain the essence of the problem or topic being discussed.

Even funny phrases speak about a person’s intelligence, because these are precisely phrases, and not interjections or fragments of sentences. After all, the phrase is always “rounded”, complete and extremely clear and interesting.

This is especially noticeable if you listen to conversations in St. Petersburg. It’s not for nothing that this city is called the cultural capital of Russia. The indigenous inhabitants of this glorious city still speak only in real phrases, and such unusual ones that you will not find in any city in our huge country.

It is in St. Petersburg that people construct their sentences and phrases in such a way that I personally always enjoy listening to them. For example, in Moscow, alas, you almost never see this anymore, and in other cities too. Although, there are two more cities in which the phrase when communicating is commonplace. This is Irkutsk (thanks to the Decembrists) and, of course, Odessa. Well, Odessa is a completely different “country”, and the phrases there are appropriate, unlike anything else, but nevertheless, it was these phrases that glorified Odessa as the most humorous city. The phrases of Odessa residents are not always beautiful, but they are certainly funny. Zhvanetsky alone is worth something!

Funny phrases - forum

Fly Aeroflot planes, there are only a few of them left...

A screw driven in with a hammer sits tighter than a nail tightened with a screwdriver.

When I eat, I am deaf and dumb, cunning and fast, and devilishly smart...

It’s hard to study, but it’s easy to get government support.

A man is the same as a woman, only better...

Dinner by candlelight, breakfast by fire extinguishers!

Blowjob is sex with a human face.

Old saying on new way: Not caught - not a conscript.

Marrying for sex is like buying a cow for milk.

Not everything is a thought that persistently pops into your head...

They lived long and died happily...

The art of sex is the ability to kiss a lady at the right time in the right place.

Another day was a waste of makeup...

I give driving lessons. Moses

Never lay a hand on your child. You're leaving your groin exposed.

Girl, why are you looking at me like that, as if your parents had gone to the dacha?

You can look at the Sun through a telescope only twice in your life. Right and left eye.

If you want to meet the girl you like more often, install Windows"95 for her

with his wife", "Hide")">Video: Semyon Slepakov: Conversation between husband and wife

Semyon Slepakov: Conversation between husband and wife

Lyrics:

Darling, you and I have more than just a marriage,

And the sacred union in unison of sounding hearts,

But at the same time, science has long established the fact -

Any male is polygamous without exception.

It doesn't mean I cheated on you

You are only one, as before, in my destiny,

But in view of the circumstances that I have outlined to you,

Please don't worry, just imagine

Purely hypothetically

Imagine the situation

What's in the bath theoretically

I might end up with friends

And I will hypothetically

In an alcoholic frenzy,

In which I, as you know,

I come periodically

And purely hypothetically,

Well, very hypothetical

There will be a woman in the bathhouse

Ancient, classical professions,

And, having drunk, she will begin to listen to Leps

Move erotically

What will it bring into action?

My mechanism is phallic

And in such a difficult situation,

Even if hypothetical,

I can hardly stay

Physically faithful to you.

I'll have to do a series with her

Acrobatic sketches

Without any romantic feelings,

And moving only mechanically,

But in light of what I have said,

It is said theoretically

Will you forgive me, my love?

Will you forgive me hypothetically?

Purely hypothetically I...

Purely hypothetically forgive?..

You are my favorite man in the world, but

I dare to break the stability of your ideas.

The fact is that science has known for a long time -

All women are monogamous by nature.

I don’t want to scare you with this information,

But listen carefully, my polygamous friend,

I'll tell you what development to expect,

If this plot happens in ours suddenly.

Purely hypothetically,

Imagine a heavy pan,

Which theoretically

Flies straight to your head

And then automatically

An electric iron is flying,

Taking away your ability

Think analytically.

And purely hypothetically

Present your new Audi

And the waves of the metal pipe,

Turning her into old.

Imagine how it approaches you

Our sharp ceramic knife

And now he is separated from you

Your mechanism is phallic.

And purely hypothetically

Imagine the situation

In which in the clinical ward

You lie sad and motionless,

And I'm flying away with my boss

To a hot tropical resort

He's been calling me for a long time

Well, purely hypothetically.

Purely hypothetically calling...

Purely hypothetically I...

Let's be each other

To love, as in lyrical

And we will always be faithful friends,

At least hypothetically.

Purely hypothetically true...

Purely hypothetically love...

Purely hypothetically always...

 

 

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